Enter Stage Write

Theater, Entertainment and Lifestyle in Orange County

Bama Football Mom Goes Ballistic – Gives Kids Bad Life Lesson

The web drops all sorts of videos on our laptop doorstep and this morning’s viral video over morning coffee is something to take in on many levels.

On first viewing I was gobsmacked with jaw dropped. Look at this drunk Bama Mamma fly! What the heck?!   She launches herself over the crowd to attack a frat kid who was exchanging words with her son. We don’t know the words exchanged, but …  holy wow.  Mamma Bear turned into a crazy lady. Her fly-by was impressive just by the pure physicality of it all.  She must do Ballet Bootcamp or Kung Fu Pilates at her local Total Woman gym.

Then there’s her drunk-walk back to her seats when her poor hubby goes to fetch her. She looks like she also took a few pole dancing fitness classes. Just WOW.

Like a good net surfer sleuth,  I followed the net to the frat kid’s twitter feed and see this:

 

The tackled college kid, Michael Connolly, uploads a different video of the “Mom and Son Moments” just before her crowd surfing stunt. I focus on the little girl standing next to her mom.  She’s smiling with an unsure look as she glances back and forth between her mom’s sexy dance and flipping off the camera to her big brother’s trash talking bravado with the frat kid. What life lessons did she learn that day? Let’s take a family outing to the football game, mom in her skinny jeans and scarf ensemble looking all cute and fun, who then turns into the mean drunk, dive bombing college kids in  what might have been a really bad college flash back attack.

 

Then there’s the dad.  Lord, he looks like Ray Morano in Everybody Loves Raymond. Bewildered with a worn down here-we-go-again look in his eyes, wishing he was somewhere else and maybe married to someone else.  She’s probably just as hard to deal with at home, slipping past any normalcy to create drama where none needs to be had.

Bama Mamma, here’s my advice:  put down the beer and Jagermeister and class up your act. Lead your children by example in good things, like actually watching the football game with your kids and not dive bombing into a college kid to start a brawl. Go home and make chili and cornbread for dinner instead of nursing your hangover and bruises.  Become the lady your kids and husband will be able to be proud of and not have to worry about future dates and employers googling the family name.  Seriously, in ancient Japan you’d have to commit harikari to bring honor back to your family.  But don’t be so brash.  Just start with baby steps and stop flipping the bird in front of your little girl.  Think more Donna Reed and less Real Housewives.  Peace out.

 

 

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